07. What're We Gonna Do About Judy Wyner?

WHAT’RE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT JUDY WYNER? Lyrics

CHORUS
What’re we going to do about Judy Wyner?
Unable to leave all her troubles behind her
In therapists’ offices is where we’ll find her
What’re we going to do about Judy Wyner?

She grew up in a Long Island town
Just like you and me
Experienced all the ups and the downs
Of going through puberty
Boys called her gross and fatty
She said she didn’t care
When other girls were dating
She sat home in her underwear.

CHORUS

Judy went to college then
And married off four roommates
And in her time at graduate school
She scared off all her dates
She was a big mouth, quite obnoxious
Her comments rude and snide
She told so many jokes
To cover the hurt inside

CHORUS

And then one day Judy saw the light
She realized she felt so much rage
It was on a Monday night
That she climbed up on a stage

She told the strangers so many things
About her lonely life
Her mother, her cat, and her fat ****
And how she was no one’s wife
The audience went crazy
Even the ones at the bar
And now big fat Judy Wyner
Is a big, fat comedy star

What’re we going to do about Judy Wyner
She’s telling us of all the troubles behind her
Her comedy’s rough but there’s nobody finer
And next week she’s sold out in North Caroline-errr
And that is where you’ll find Judy Wyner.