What's The Matter?

What’s the Matter With Me

What’s the matter with me today, must be somethin’ strange
My horoscope says that my bad moon’s risin’, my lucky star’s ‘bout to change
Big man ridin’ his motorcycle, winin’ ‘bout the wind in his face
Lady from New York in Arizona, yappin’ all over the place
I don’t have enough money in my pocket, to pay ‘em to leave me alone
Guess I’ll have to be the one, to turn and go on home

What’s got into me today, must be somethin’ weird
Maybe it’s the air or the latitude, or maybe that time of the year
I don’t wanna see nobody’s face, I don’t wanna talk on the phone
Maybe I’ll bury my head in the sand so the world will leave me alone
But that won’t work cause with just my luck, a donkey will come on past
See my headless body there, kick me in the rear

What’s come over me today, must be somethin’ new
Feel like dyin’ or maybe just cryin’, feelin’ down and blue
Painted myself into a corner, got nowhere to go
Never saw it comin’ I’m a real bad painter, how was I to know
The wind blowin’ me all over this town, got me on the jag
Chasin’ my dog, my shorts are too tight, what a dog-gone drag

What’s the matter with me today, never been this bad
Can’t find comfort in my skin, the worst case I ever had
Had to turn down an invitation to roll around in the sack
Told her I couldn’t and I sent her home, don’t think she’ll be back
Vacuum salesman at the door, all I said was “see ya”
Ran plumb outta toilet paper, and I got diarrhea

Hey ya’ll I’m sittin’ here watchin’ the sun a settin’ on one hell of a day
I’m sittin’ in the corner and I’m all alone, ain’t got nothin’ to say
My face is chapped, my legs are chafed, sand all up in my ears
My hind-side’s sore from the mornin’ paper, it’s worse than it appears
Next time that I see ‘em comin’ I better get outta the way
Nip my blues right in the bud, save a real bad day


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