Fortunes

This song is about trying to release my anxious grip on life. Since I was a little girl, I’ve had a tendency to imagine all the different ways in which things might end. I’d lay in bed and work myself up into anxiety attacks. “Fortunes” is about calming down. I’m always looking for signs, trying to stay ahead of the game. I suppose the reality is that we have some control, but ultimately we are part of a much, much larger picture. We can guess all we want, but in the end life is a rollercoaster. We don’t have much say in the design of the track beneath us. There’s a ton of freedom and enjoyment to be had if we can just let go and marvel. I sang this vocal at the end of a long day in the studio. We did two or three tired takes I think, and I was expecting to go back and re-sing it, but I never did. I like that I’m weary in it. The line about the black dog with my dreams in its mouth is all about the turmoil I was in over my career. I went through years of depression and fear about my music. I had to turn around and face that dog and wrestle my dreams back from his slobbering mouth. It was appropriate to have “Dante” first, and this song last. I have come such a long way since then.

The line “There are no answers, just stories to be told” was inspired by a Garrison Keillor quote: “You get older, and you realize there are no answers, just stories.” I’ve predicted some things in my life, but for the most part, I’ve been very wrong about the details. I have been so, so fortunate to have found such wonderful mentors, friends, and partners in this industry after feeling so down about it for so long. Like I sing in this song: “It don’t get easy, no, but it’s a beautiful life / May every ending be the door to a better ride.”