Blame it on the Dog

well, the horse got out
the well ran dry
the neighbor’s cow trampled the garden
bailer lost a pin,
barn roof caved in
and the ground is gettin harder and harder
the front porch leaks
the back door squeaks
the weeds are choking all the flowers
my shÈs are too tight
my hair’s not right
and the kitchen clock is losing it’s hours
gonna blame it on the dog
it’s on account of that dog
it’s all because of that dog
that you brought home last summer
i said we don’t need a dog
we don’t need another dog
but you brought home a dog
what a bummer
the truck got a flat
i can’t find a good hat
my jeans are getting smaller and smaller
dishwasher broke
there’s no rum for my coke
and the kids are getting taller and taller
the rabbits ate the peas
the grass makes me sneeze
every single car has a dent
if it were up to me
i’d live in a tree
by myself and pay no rent
— chorus —
that dog chewed my shÈ
two pillows and a belt
and my favorite pair of socks
it rained on the hay
the cat ran away
the mower ran over a rock
the new car got old
the bread was full of mold
and a hailstone hit me in the eye
your skirt’s too long
my slÕves are too short
someone ate the last piece of pie
— chorus —