Sorry No We Can't Be Friends

We met in the summer on a Brooklyn corner
when I was just four and you three
And you liked my Cher doll and I liked your big wheel
so we got along naturally (became friends naturally)
We’d run through the sprinklers and get into trouble
The boys we would tease and then run
Then I would get punished and you would get scolded
Ending our day in the sun
Apparently you were a bad influence
Putting our plans to an end
no no, no no, sorry no we can’t be friends

We met in our grade school and you sat behind me
you were the first to say hi
I had just moved here and you had just transferred
so you understood my plight
I asked mom if you could come over and play
And everything was fine till you came
My mom noticed you weren’t one of our kind
and she sent you home right away
Now My mom’s a bigot, and your mom’s a harlot
But it seems they’re fighting again
No no, no no, sorry no we can’t be friends

I met you in high school we had the same classes
like bio and drama and chem
We’d go out on weekends, and liked the same music
There was no separating us then
Now I liked a boy that you happened to like
And then he happened to like me
You made me choose as you hated to lose
“it’s either him or it’s me”
I tried to explain it wasn’t my fault
that love is a thing that just ha-ppens (loves not a thing to depend?)
you said no no, no no, sorry no we can’t be friends

We met in college and were in-sep-ra-ble
For so many years we were close
We each got married and had our 2 children
But your love is what I valued most.
come the election we’re in different directions
I voted blue and you red
20 years of friendship were ended on Facebook
From things that we wrote and had said
Sorry this tale won’t end happily
This is where the story will end
No no, no no, sorry no we can’t be friends
No No No No Sorry no we can’t be friends